To Be a Man

     It has occurred to many that the standard and accepted portrayal of men in our society is twofold: either as bumbling idiots, likable yes, but no one you'd want balancing your checkbook or running the house; or as selfish sex-craving misogynists who see women as objects or less. I for one have often railed as to the unfairness of these portrayals and how they do little more than foster the belief that this is all men have to offer. Worse still are those who see the undervaluing of men in our culture and simply don't bother to be more. Biblicaly speaking men are called to be more than this. We are to be leaders, teachers, guides, protectors, guards, lovers, and more. Despite this high calling for men we see very little of it in our world. I've pondered this problem for some time and although there are many reasons why things have turned out this way I'm left with only one conclusion: Men are portrayed as idiots because men -on the whole- are.

     It is not however, an entirely conscious choice. Part of the effect of the fall was to have men become lazy and women developing the desire to take their place. This wouldn't seem like a huge problem if it weren't for the fact that these desire did not replace the knowledge of our proper positions. Due to our fallen nature men don't want to lead, we'd rather take it easy. Many women would rather make all the decisions (because men are pretty dumb, right?) but still think that men “should” be commanding and in charge and confident. This creates a viscous cycle of anger and resentment that destroys many homes.

     Looking outside the home and into society we see that it is not simply a relationship issue. Men everywhere are deliberately casting aside “manhood,” choosing instead to adopt more 'modern' ideas of gender roles. Traditional “manliness” has been nearly vilified by our culture as chauvinistic and elitist, even so far to make chivalry a form of demeaning behavior! All this is a problem but the biggest issue really is that many men simply never become men at all. We live in a world where adolescence simply continues on through a boys life, he never grows up and he never moves on from childhood. How many “young men” do you know -guys in their mid to late twenties- who have never had a long term relationship, have never given a single thought to marriage, who still live at home, or who don't put any effort into creating a substantial foundation to their life? This is a systemic problem, to such an extent that we don't even see the issue. In my own life I can perceive parts of my thoughts and behaviors that I know should probably be...more that they are. Of course there are extenuating circumstances and not every case is the same but people these days seem to be terrified of really growing up and cling to youth as long as they can.

     I'm not going to give you solutions, I don't really have them. This is a thing that must start at home; husbands and fathers taking their place and doing things right. They will influence their children and so on down the line. Men were meant to be the cornerstone, the strength in society that held firm against error and stood up to the problems around them. We've lost that today and I think we're suffering for it.

“Be watchful. Stand fast in the faith. Act like men. Be strong. Let all you do be done in love.”

(1 Corinthians 16:13-14)